My mind has been very flustered lately. Well, actually since I started working but more so the past week. So much uncertainty. It is a blessing that I can still find glimpses of peace and tranquility in my mind a few seconds at a time throughout the day.
For the past week I have been on vacation but I spent most of the time struggling with the dilemma of whether to stay at my workplace for the entire 3-year MS program or transfer to a PhD program next year staying in the same field or to switch field completely e.g. to I/O psychology. After a week of thinking and talking to people, I finally made up my mind to stay and go through with the three years. Despite the excessively structured environment and high stress, I will get the best training to be a teacher, behaviorist, and a clinician. My challenge, to remember to be as present and human as possible to the students and other teachers. Tomorrow, I start work and I can't help feeling nervous about going back to work. I worry that I might forget the students' guidelines, I am not looking forward to going back to the stress, and I am afraid I will not be good in general. So many doubtful and irrational thoughts swam in my head for the past 2 hours. Yikes...
I pray for peace of mind.
I pray for the strength to love and exude joy to the students that I am working with and the teachers too.
I pray for mindfulness of my actions and the sharp awareness of my surroundings.
I pray for the wisdom and intuition to make the appropriate decisions both at work and in life.
I pray for the openness to look at the glass as half full at all times.
I pray for the well-being of the students and the other teachers as well as my own.
I pray for a smooth transition back to work tomorrow and the best of my performance.
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